lb_lee: Rogan drawing/writing in a spiral. (art)
The Sins-of-Flesh Demon
Summary: Reverend Alpert meets a demon who just won't leave him alone. And she's friendly. NSFW.
Series: Reverend Alpert, the Traveling Exorcist
Word Count: 3474
Notes: Winner of this month's Patreon poll! And wow, talk about a blast from the past. We originally wrote the Sins-of-Flesh Demon back in 2011(!) for the first writeathon we ever threw, writing stories according to reader prompt. Shawn of Rolodexaspirin wanted kinky demon/exorcist porno; we had no idea what Reverend Alpert would end up becoming! Alpert (and the demon girl) ended up keeping us in toothpaste and toilet paper during the Homeless Year, which meant this story became a slight inconvenience--anyone who read THIS as the first chapter of the series would reasonably (and incorrectly) assume it was a porn series, but it was also such a keystone story that it couldn't really be removed or changed. It's undergone some major revisions so as to better mesh with the new first chapter, The Gestaltist of Blood. Content warnings in the comments.

Alpert was young, two-named, naked and face down in the dirt, arms pinned by High Guards whose features were long since blurred away by time and memory. A thousand faceless witnesses stared down at him from the amphitheater’s stands, a wheel of eyes. He felt Booker Z. Lilac’s weight come down onto his back, holding him down, and agony sliced into his back like fire. He screamed into the gag in his mouth.


lb_lee: Rogan drawing/writing in a spiral. (art)
The Gestaltist of Blood
Series: Reverend Alpert
Summary: At the start of the story, before he meets Perfection, Alpert gets caught by some enterprising bandits.
Word Count: 1200
Notes: I was never fully satisfied with the first, introductory Alpert story being “the Sins of Flesh Demon.” This story is meant to fulfill that role, and also to jive with the eventual paperback omnibus. This story was posted with the support of the LiberaPay and Patreon crews!


“I don’t like robbing no Gestaltist,” one of the bandits was saying. “No telling what they’ll pull on you.”

The other bandit, a woman, rolled her eyes. “Don’t be superstitious. At least he ain’t no hoodoo man; now they are the worst.”

“Hoodoo men, you know what you’re getting,” the first insisted. “My granddaddy was a hoodoo man, and a damn good one. Gestaltists, though, they do all sorts of damn fool things, don’t got no proper tradition, no lineage, you know what I’m saying? They could be any damn thing.”

Blood and Chalk )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, enclosed within a circle with the words LB Lee. (Default)
Lots of images behind this cut! )

Hey guys!  At request of a friend of mine, I decided to upload the chalk works from Reverend Alpert.  These are the diagrams Alpert draws to exorcise, ward, and direct himself to his next case.

I’m actually pretty proud of the system I came up with for this, since I’m about as mathematical and geometrical as Silly Putty.  However, I wanted to make a system that followed a simple, versatile system, looked good, and that Alpert could whip out fairly quickly once he got the hang of free-handing circles and straight lines. (He spent a LOT of his first years as a chalk exorcist on his hands and knees, fighting with a compass and straight-edge.  He actually WANTED to choose a medium that required forethought and precision over instant sloppy power.)

The basic system is pretty simple: circles are for purification, triangles for warning, convex polygons are defensive, concave polygons are offensive. The more vertexes a polygon has, the more powerful they are and also the more energy they drain.  If Alpert is too worn out, he can’t power his works.

Chaining multiple works together doesn’t make them any more powerful; it just means when one goes dead, another will instantly take over.  No matter how spry Alpert is, all works eventually burn out.  Some shapes are more stable than others; wards can last all night if nothing trips them, while binding stars burn out within an hour or less.  Except for Veggie Star up there, which was designed specifically to last a long time, at the cost of power.  It’s good for exorcising bushels of possessed produce, but not much else, which is why Perfection can walk on it.

There’s more, but that’s the basics!

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