M.D., Space Slut of the Galaxy
Aug. 10th, 2011 10:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lb_leeM.D./Thomas – M.D., Space Slut of the Galaxy
Prompt: Birth
Summary: M.D. explains the process of Senyan reproduction to Thomas.
A/N: Back in the beginning, before Thomas realized he never wanted to make out with M.D. ever in a million years.
“Hey, babe.”
“Mm?”
“Wanna do it?”
“Sure.”
“Whoa, seriously?”
“Yeah, right after I finish gouging out my own frontal lobe with a rusty spork and eating it.”
“Oh.”
Silence.
“You could’ve just said no, you know.”
“Yeah, but then I wouldn’t have gotten to see the look on your face. You practically look disappointed.”
Silence.
“Uh. Thomas? I was kidding.”
“I know, Jesus. You’re like my little sister; it’d probably feel creepy and incest-y anyway.”
“The adjective form is incestuous, just so you know, and—wait, you were serious? Ew!”
“Hey, I haven’t seen an Earthling girl in a year and a half, okay? By this point, if they can have a conversation with me in some language I can half-understand, and if they’re a girl, I’ll do them.”
“Jeez, I feel so flattered, knowing that of all the females in this world, you have chosen me for your affections. Truly I am a snowflake, unique in every way.”
“You sound so hurt. I thought you didn’t want to do me?”
“I don’t, but if you were going to be serious, I expected you to at least put some effort into it. I’m not asking for roses and chocolate or anything, but dang, Thomas, that was weak.”
Silence.
“So you didn’t have sex with the green space jellyfish?”
“No, babe. I didn’t have sex with the green space jellyfish.”
“Stop acting insulted. You told me that.”
“I’m just embarrassed for you, because you believed me—ow! What was that for?”
“We just did it.”
“…what?”
“It’s how we Senyan have sex.”
“By smacking me upside the head?”
“Yup. I just impregnated your brain with my space ovaries. If they got through your hair goop, that is, yech, what do you use…”
“That’s bull. That’s not how y’all have sex!”
“Is so! Ask Bobby; that’s totally how it works on my home planet. Impregnating your brain with space ovaries.”
“You’re so full of crap, M.D. If that were true, you’d be the biggest space slut in the galaxy. Jeez, Biff would’ve had, like, eight of your babies by now…”
“Just wait three months. By that point, the pregnancy should be showing.”
“Full. Of. Crap.”
“Three. Months. Ack! Thomas, no, you know I can’t stand your brain—”
“Haha!”
“Augh! I am forever unclean and tainted!”
“There. Now I just impregnated your brain with my space sperm.”
“You’re an Earthling, you houseplant; you don’t have space sperm! Argh…”
“Three months, babe. Three months.”
“Oh god, that was disgusting, your brain is like every bad teen movie I never saw, only it was in Spanish!”
“The word is telenovela, thank you, and I’m totally telling everyone we space-did it, now. Raige is going to be so jealous.”
“I hate you so much. God, I’ll never get this stuff out of my hair, ugh, what is wrong with you…”
“You’re just mad I know you’re the biggest space slut in the galaxy.”
Prompt: Birth
Summary: M.D. explains the process of Senyan reproduction to Thomas.
A/N: Back in the beginning, before Thomas realized he never wanted to make out with M.D. ever in a million years.
“Hey, babe.”
“Mm?”
“Wanna do it?”
“Sure.”
“Whoa, seriously?”
“Yeah, right after I finish gouging out my own frontal lobe with a rusty spork and eating it.”
“Oh.”
Silence.
“You could’ve just said no, you know.”
“Yeah, but then I wouldn’t have gotten to see the look on your face. You practically look disappointed.”
Silence.
“Uh. Thomas? I was kidding.”
“I know, Jesus. You’re like my little sister; it’d probably feel creepy and incest-y anyway.”
“The adjective form is incestuous, just so you know, and—wait, you were serious? Ew!”
“Hey, I haven’t seen an Earthling girl in a year and a half, okay? By this point, if they can have a conversation with me in some language I can half-understand, and if they’re a girl, I’ll do them.”
“Jeez, I feel so flattered, knowing that of all the females in this world, you have chosen me for your affections. Truly I am a snowflake, unique in every way.”
“You sound so hurt. I thought you didn’t want to do me?”
“I don’t, but if you were going to be serious, I expected you to at least put some effort into it. I’m not asking for roses and chocolate or anything, but dang, Thomas, that was weak.”
Silence.
“So you didn’t have sex with the green space jellyfish?”
“No, babe. I didn’t have sex with the green space jellyfish.”
“Stop acting insulted. You told me that.”
“I’m just embarrassed for you, because you believed me—ow! What was that for?”
“We just did it.”
“…what?”
“It’s how we Senyan have sex.”
“By smacking me upside the head?”
“Yup. I just impregnated your brain with my space ovaries. If they got through your hair goop, that is, yech, what do you use…”
“That’s bull. That’s not how y’all have sex!”
“Is so! Ask Bobby; that’s totally how it works on my home planet. Impregnating your brain with space ovaries.”
“You’re so full of crap, M.D. If that were true, you’d be the biggest space slut in the galaxy. Jeez, Biff would’ve had, like, eight of your babies by now…”
“Just wait three months. By that point, the pregnancy should be showing.”
“Full. Of. Crap.”
“Three. Months. Ack! Thomas, no, you know I can’t stand your brain—”
“Haha!”
“Augh! I am forever unclean and tainted!”
“There. Now I just impregnated your brain with my space sperm.”
“You’re an Earthling, you houseplant; you don’t have space sperm! Argh…”
“Three months, babe. Three months.”
“Oh god, that was disgusting, your brain is like every bad teen movie I never saw, only it was in Spanish!”
“The word is telenovela, thank you, and I’m totally telling everyone we space-did it, now. Raige is going to be so jealous.”
“I hate you so much. God, I’ll never get this stuff out of my hair, ugh, what is wrong with you…”
“You’re just mad I know you’re the biggest space slut in the galaxy.”
