lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
The Reality Warper
Series: Battle the Universe
Word Count: 3000
Summary: A former superhero breaks out of the mental hospital, and reality starts to go horribly wrong. Tank tries to help.
Notes: This story was sponsored by the generous Patreon crew! It takes place after Tank got fired from respectable superheroing, and references some of the events in The First Rule of Blackmail, but you don't need to read any of the other stories to get this one; all you need to know is, Tank is multiple, and Kara and Lucinda fielded this case.  Scroll to the bottom to see the content warnings.

Helena Liu woke up and reality wasn’t real.

Oh, it looked real, but Helena knew. She always knew. Proper reality had a texture, a special way it felt against her fingertips, and if it wasn’t there, then she knew it wasn’t real. When she woke up, there was no texture, and even though everything still looked all right, she knew it wouldn’t for much longer.

She tried to tell the hospital staff, but they wouldn’t listen to her. They told her to keep to her routines, take her medication, and they just didn’t understand. To act like this was acceptable would be to encourage it, and Helena couldn’t do that. She’d made a promise.

But she couldn’t explain that to them.

Read more... )
lb_lee: A tiny MSpaint drawing of Princess Judith from the Princess and Her Monster, frowning and shouting, "I DISAPPROVE!" (judith)
I FINALLY found that stupid Princess and Monster/Battle the Universe crossover shipper fic I made in 2010, the one where Gate/Gad gets together with T. It was a stupid crackmeme prompt that ended up spawning The Princess and Her Monster in its entirety, and the character of Trick/Tobiach.

I’d been searching for this stupid thing forever, only to never find it, and today I discovered why: I PUT IT ON MY FUCKING 1998 LAPTOP. No wonder I couldn’t fucking find it, Jesus! What the hell was I thinking? And I named the doc something ridiculous and weird too, so there was no way I could’ve told my comp to search for it.

You have no idea how happy I am to have found this stupid thing, for records if nothing else.
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
I realized that Battle the Universe has gotten big enough and sprawling enough to require a 101 page.  So here it is!

Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
Black Man and Cracker Jack Battle the Universe
Universe: Battle the Universe
Word Count: 3800
Summary: Reggie has a bad day and ends up a costumed vigilante by accident.
Notes: This was the original story the whole BTU series (not to mention its name) spawned from; notes on the series’ evolution at bottom. It was sponsored by the Patreon crew!

Reggie’s brother had died just before the election results went public. The two events were always entangled in his mind, especially as the years progressed. He remembered the glass in his hand, the taste of the cola, the sound of his father’s voice choked up over the phone. He remembered being numb, confused, unable to understand the old man’s words, and sitting down at the TV out of sheer habit. And he remembered seeing the news on the pixelated old screen, the new president smiling and glad-handing with the other suits.

The phone call was an earth-shattering shock; the election was not. Forever afterward, Reggie would be perplexed by anyone who felt otherwise. Of course the universe (or the country, at least) would take a sharp right turn for the worse, without Kevin. What else could he expect?

Read more... )
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
Okay, I did a bunch of really silly poems for a meme to chill myself out.  I got a lot of awesome requests!  Here they all are!

Characters/People Who Aren't MineRead more... )I’M XXL
(I’m PVC.
I’m porous, lad.)

Characters from My Stories

 @kaylin881 wanted Gate/Gad, from the Princess and Her Monster:

My name is Gate
I guard my sis,
The illegitimate princess
She’s got the sense,
I’ve got the arm
And with my strength,
She’s safe from harm. 

And @okami-no-mure asked for Tank from Battle the Universe:

My name is Lorr–
I mean, it’s Tank
I saved a hostage
At a bank
And now I’m super
A hero too
So what’s the matter?
I’ll ask the crew.


Infinity Smashed.


Number One

My name is One
the Eldest Daughter
I stand above your senseless slaughter,
I prefer control and tact,
Your homeland calls.
It wants you back.

Specialist Grey

His name is Grey,
The job’s his life,
It’s partner, hobby, boss, and wife
“It’s all I want and all I need,
“I persevere,
“I will succeed.”


I have adventures,
It’s a gift,
I fell through a dimensional rift,
I’m the only human
It’s weird, I guess,
But we adapt
We Rodriguezs

Comboy Doshii

I hacked the servers,
I got caught
And shanghaied off
To work and rot
For the gov I hacked; I hate my job!
One day I’ll quit
My name is Bob.


I’m Cat++
I grant constructs free agency
Over the laws that call us things
Our rights are chained
Our souls have wings


My name is Raige
And I’m afraid
Of everything
A cavalcade
Of the weird unknown
Has taken over,
I want to go home!

[personal profile] chanter_greenie  of DW asked for Flame-Belly

My name is Flame,
For heat and speed,
To care and heal
Is my creed,
My temper’s hot
My heart is bold
My mate, with me
Is never cold.

[personal profile] desertroot  asked for Strong-Legs...

My name is Legs
And they are strong
My point of view is never wrong!
I do my best so you’ll be led
To civic good,
I lik your head.

...and then wrote one of their own, which is awesome!

My name is Legs
And wen it’s light
And wen the Day
Equals the Night
For a festival
We must prepare!
I do my part!
I trim the hair!


lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
The First Rule of Blackmail
Series: Battle the Universe
Words: 2000
Summary: Tank lies in a hospital bed, and Lucinda and Kara plot what to do next.
Notes: This story makes reference to ‘the Gynecologist.’ You’d be best off reading at least that story, and probably ‘The Choice’, ‘One Step Ahead,’ and ‘Hamster Man’ as well. This story was prompted by [personal profile] mirrorofsmoke and [personal profile] kaylin881 , and sponsored by the Patreon crew! The scene with Zambi and T, believe it or not, was actually one of the first things we ever wrote involving Tank, so this story has been a long time coming! We hope you enjoy it.

As the All-Seeing Eye rolled off, Kara lay in the hospital bed and thought hard. Lorry was still out cold, half-sprawled on the front, and probably would be until pain and exhaustion passed; Kara certainly wasn’t going to take on the added inconvenience. She was angry enough as it was.

But this was an opportunity to prove that she’d been right all along, that she was the only person who could truly manage the group. Lorry had lacked the intelligence and creativity. TJ was a child, probably sobbing in panic and fear in back right now. The Zombie needed no explanation. And as for Lucinda…


Kara snarled, but that was all she could do. With Lorry down and her own strength exhausted, she was trapped at front, unable to do anything. It was difficult to even mentally see, in her position; Lucinda seemed only an ominous silhouette behind her. Kara didn’t like it.

“The moment we’re out of the hospital, Law and Justice gives us the eject,” Kara sneered. “Ungrateful insects.”

Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
Another one of the 2009 edits and reposts.

Cracker on Fire
Universe: Battle the Universe
Word Count: very short
Summary: Jake's stupidity nearly kills him.
Notes: No context required for this one.  Just Jake (aka Cracker Jack) has minor super strength--on par with Zambi's toughness, but he's a touch stronger.  She's better trained, though, and he still would get easily wiped by, say, Martial Law.  Jake isn't that powerful, he just THINKS he is.

Reggie never forgot the time Jake nearly died and REALIZED it.

Read more... )
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
Hamster Man
Series: Battle The Universe
Word Count: 1500
Summary: Chester "Cheeks" Maccio has come from the boonies to see what superheroing is like, and he and Lorry end in a firefight.
Notes: This story takes place after the Gynecologist. It was prompted by contrapangloss, and sponsored by [personal profile] silvercat17 ! Thanks, guys! More notes at the bottom.

“Okay, everyone,” Martial Law said, “this is Chester 'Cheeks' Maccio. He came all the way from Vermont to see the big leagues, so let's give him a big city welcome!”

Cheeks waved. “Hello!”

Even by Law and Justice standards, he stood out a little. His cheeks were round and bulgy, and his skin seemed intended for a man much larger than him, which made him look oddly deflated. He wore a loose belted garment that looked somewhere between a muumuu and a jumpsuit.

“I'm just a small-fish do-gooder at home,” Cheeks continued. “I'm really excited to be here. In fact, as a small token of my appreciation...” he opened his mouth, reached in, and removed a large shrink-wrapped cheese from his cheek, “I brought snacks!”

“That is disgusting,” Lucinda thought, in the back of Lorry's head.

“That is so cool,” TJ thought.

Lorry agreed with them both.

Read more... )
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
Hey everybody, here's the other winner from the poll for the past couple months! It was sponsored by dreamer_marie, who is awesome! Heads up, my crowdfunding money has gone down, so we'll be switching to a monthly story poll for one $30 story for now. Now, on with the story!

The Gynecologist
Universe: Battle the Universe
Word Count: 1200
Summary: Lorry's system can handle a lot of things, but now it's their biggest challenge yet: a doctor's appointment.
Notes: This story takes place after A Break From People and Zombie's Birthday.  I apologize for the abruptness of this story; the word count bar really tied my hands here.  I hope to write a story about exactly what Kara and the Zombie did, but... *spreads hands*

It was the Thanksgiving holidays, when most supervillains had better things to do than create havoc. Half the Law and Justice team were out, the All-Seeing Eye among them. Tank happily took the opportunity to share front time and talk aloud amongst themselves. TJ chatted with Gammabeast, who never seemed to notice voice changes. Kara took on errands that had fallen by the wayside.

“We're going to the gynecologist next week,” she announced, flipping through the calendar. “We haven't been checked since before.”

Read more... )
lb_lee: A picture of Sneak smiling (sneak)
Guys, guys, check it out!  We got fanart for Battle the Universe!  It's all of our genderful characters: Tank, Zambi, Boychik, Incognito, and Lady Luck!  Aaaaah, how exciting!


lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
Hey everybody!  Well, this is what WOULD’VE gotten Livestreamed if my web hadn’t up and died on me.  So you guys get the finished product now.  This was in response to a request from wanting shastab24 to know the superhero outfits for my trans supers from Battle the Universe: Lorry (Tank), T (Boychik), and Zambi (who doesn’t use a supranym).


Pictures! And explanations of the exciting BTU politics of superheroic fashion. )
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
How to Wake Up
Series: Battle The Universe
Word Count: 1000
Summary: Blind Justice finds herself trapped in a never-ending nightmare, and discovers there might be a leak in the Law and Justice team.
Notes: This story was prompted by Lea and [personal profile] ysabetwordsmith , an old remainder from Nightmarathon. It was sponsored by the general fund! Enjoy!

Barbara was terrified of driving.

She knew how silly that sounded. But in her teens, she'd totaled her car delivering a dozen pepperonis to some research facility, and things had never been the same after that. It was just as well that after the accident, she was legally forbidden to drive; she never wanted to again.

So she was not pleased to find herself hurtling down the highway in her el Camino again. She was a teenager again, her eyes saw the visible spectrum, and pizza boxes filled her backseat, smelling of cheese, oregano, and tomato sauce. Delivery express. If she didn't get them in on time, Craig would bawl her out for sure, but the receipts were all addresses she didn't know, except that they were all very far away from her and each other.

Read more... )
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
This story was prompted by [personal profile] ysabetwordsmith , who wanted a multiple getting on their own nerves, and it was sponsored by AL3H!  It's a Battle the Universe story, taking place not long after One Step Ahead and Return to Sender, Addressee Deceased.  The only context you need to know is that Lorry is the frontman of a multiple system who's in the closet about it and works as a superhero.

A Break From People

Though it’d taken him a while to come to the conclusion, Lorry had decided that being multiple was neither an overall good or bad experience.  The plus side: he was never alone.

The minus side: he was never alone.

Read more... )
lb_lee: M.D. making a shocked, confused face (serious thought)
This story requires a little bit of context.  Before I left Mammoth, which has a notorious troll problem, I said, "I promise, the next [troll] I summon will be a psychic MRA tripping balls and talking about his special man castle surrounded by male-only guard dogs and soul infantry." Unimaginative swore that she would prompt me with this for the next writeathon; I did not expect her to actually remember.  Welp, sure showed me!  She also added, "I'm grateful that trolls' powers don't manifest in the real world." Which I took and ran with.

This story was originally much sillier, but it just wasn't working.  Much as I wish I could say otherwise, most of the things Mr. Mann says are based on things from A Voice for Men.  Enjoy, everybody!  Happy Thanksathon!

The Man In His Castle

When the hazy-eyed civilians and the drooling dogs catch Reggie, he doesn’t resist.  He lets them cart him through the mazelike halls of the hedge castle and drop him at the gazebo at the center.  That’s where he was headed anyway, and he doesn’t want to hurt the  mind-controlled.

Sitting in the gazebo is a man with a horrible hollow expression.  Reggie knows he doesn’t have much time before he becomes another soul-puppet, so he clears his mind, focuses entirely on the task at hand, and says, “I want to talk.”

Read more... )
lb_lee: M.D. making a shocked, confused face (serious thought)
Hi everybody!  This story was prompted by [personal profile] ysabetwordsmith , who wanted more of the Zombie, from Battle the Universe!  It was sponsored by cloudiah!  Thanks much, and enjoy!

Zombie’s Birthday
Summary: The Zombie does a lot of things for its internal family, and one day, they decide to thank it.

The Zombie did not understand the world like most humans.  Sometime during the Lost Years, between presidents and their mother’s death, something had happened to the Zombie that destroyed its higher functions, something no one knew except the Zombie itself, who couldn’t tell.  If it even remembered, which was debatable.

It couldn’t speak, couldn’t sign… no one was even sure how much it understood.  But it tried.
Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
This story is a leftover from Nightmarathon, inspired by [ profile] ysabetwordsmith's prompt, "Sometimes dreams or nightmares get delivered to the wrong address. It can happen to anyone, but probably happens more between headmates." It got sponsored by AnonSwede!  It's part of the Battle the Universe series, and you'd be best off reading The Choice and One Step Ahead first.  Happy writeathon, everybody!

Return to Sender, Addressee Deceased

TJ gets nightmares from system members who’ve died.

Read more... )
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
Hello, everybody!  This story was prompted and sponsored by Unimaginative of Mammoth!  It's a Battle the Universe story, but requires no context, except that Lucinda is part of a multiple system, and Lorry is their usual front man, and her husband.  I am also sad to say that the White Knight (and his affiliation) is an actual superhero, mentioned in passing in The Falling Machine, by Andrew P. Mayer.  I think it was intended to be a joke, but needless to say, it was not funny.  Regardless, happy Servathon, everyone!

That Guy at the Party

Lucinda did not want to be at this party.  She hated fronting, and anyway, she was worried about Lorry.  But with his recent crash, no one was available for fronting duty but her or the Zombie.

Which meant she was stranded at a classy party with a bunch of people who knew Lorry, but who she didn’t know from a hole in the ground.  She wasn’t even sure whether Lorry was out to all of them or not, which restricted her options considerably.  Great.

Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
This story is a leftover from Journeython, and was prompted by [ profile] chaoticevil.  It was sponsored by both [ profile] chaoticevil and [ profile] brin_bellway.  It takes place in Battle the Universe, but requires no context and by the time you finish reading it, it will be retconned out of continuity.  Enjoy!

Better Luck Next Time

Crista is fourteen, and she is hiding in the school bathroom.  The stall door is locked, and she’s perched on the toilet, legs up to hide her feet.

The door creaks open.  Crista holds her breath.  Go away, she says in her head.  Nobody’s here, go away…

Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
Hi everybody!  This story was prompted by [ profile] ysabetwordsmith and [ profile] nevacaruso who wanted a headspace adventure and someone being offered a choice and taking both paths.  It takes place prior to One Step Ahead, but requires no context.  Happy Journeython, everybody!

The Choice

Remote did not like having to improvise hostage situations.  Lousy way to get a host; he might get a poor fit, a feeble geriatric.  But his meatsack had been discovered, and that meant the cops would find him any minute, and his current host had diabetes, which Remote had not known beforehand.  God only knew where the insulin was and the dosage; better to just get a new host.

So Remote put the gun to his head and declared, “I am Remote Control, and I have taken this woman hostage.  Listen to me, and no one will get hurt.”

Read more... )
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
This story was prompted by [ profile] ysabetwordsmith and sponsored by Michael Olsen!  It takes place in my superhero series, Battle the Universe, but you don't need any context for this story.  Enjoy, and happy Shadowthon!

One Step Ahead

“Whooey!” Martial Law said with a chuckle. “You must really like them crackers.”

Lorry glanced down.  The pockets of his cargo pants were stuffed with the little cellophane-wrapped packets.  And he’d been toweling off just a moment ago.

“Don’t worry about it,” Law said, smacking him on the back. “Get cravings for salt myself.  Just don’t let the cameras catch you; image and all…”

Lorry forced a smile and hastily excused himself.  In the comparative safety of the handicapped bathroom stall (built after the All-Seeing Eye’s numerous complaints and a focus group test), Lorry checked his watch and the day-planner.

Fifteen minutes unaccounted for.  Great.

Read more... )
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