lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
2014-10-26 07:30 pm

[sticky entry] Sticky: LB's Welcome Post!

Hello! Welcome to the writing site and blog of LB Lee, AKA Loony-Brain.  We're a multivarious entity who makes mental health comics, draws pretty pictures, and writes about reality melting.

Quick Links For New Folks on Dreamwidth:

Quick Links for Our Work


Stories for sale! ) 

EDIT:
If you're trying to use the Paypal button on this page and it fails, please let me know immediately so I can fix it again! Until then, you can always use the button on our profile. freehit counter
lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
2017-10-13 02:18 pm
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Alter Boys In Love for sale!

Hey guys!  Well, Alter Boys In Love came faster than I expected, so now it's up for sale!  The paper version is $20.  The ebook version is $10!
Cover and blurb cut to spare my watchers. )
Now to get LB Goes to Alaska done!
lb_lee: A short-haired person flexing their muscles and declaring, "Queer trans multi proud!" (pride)
2017-10-12 01:35 pm
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The multiplicity symbol is NOT DID-only.

So, it turns out HMS_Beagles, who haven't been around since 2011, still had their email account up all this time.  People were sending them emails about adding sites to the healthymultiplicity.com list as late as 2015!  Which is embarrassing; I had no idea. (And even then, it never would've occurred to me I could or should access their account.)

Before I delete the account, I've been manually wading through all the spam and sending messages informing everyone that Beagles is gone, the listing is gone, and for all other inquiries, they should email us instead.

But in the process, conveniently, I happen to get a hard citation for the creation of the multiplicity symbol--you know, the one with the interlocking circles?  People on tumblr are apparently claiming it's a DID-only symbol now, and here's hard proof that it's not, because the creator, ouregaiya, emailed it to Beagles when they created it in October 2011.  Ouregaiya are still active, and about as hardcore as it's possible to be, as far as medicalization of DID goes; their site reads, "Multiplicity is not an illness or disorder."

A screencap, for evidence:Cut to avoid spam. )
lb_lee: A short-haired person flexing their muscles and declaring, "Queer trans multi proud!" (pride)
2017-10-11 04:54 pm
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Multi Books: (George), by E. L. Konigsberg

Hey guys, at the library yesterday, I got myself a weird old multi book: (George), by E. L. Konigsberg.

This book is kinda a fascinatingly weird artifact; it's a children's book from 1970, so before Sybil, and before the whole "multiplicity is caused by trauma" thing.  Hell, this book is older than the freakin' diagnosis of Multiple Personality Disorder!  Back when this book was written, it was "Hysterical Neurosis, Dissociative Type."

But anyway, this book, true to the other Konigsberg books we've read, is a quiet, gently-paced story about this chemistry geek, Ben, the "little man who lives inside of him" named George, and Ben's little brother Howard, who knows about them both.  As Ben starts getting into middle school age, he starts having disagreements with George about a friend at school, and finally George, Ben, and Howard all have to join forces to set things right.

Spoilers and talk about the book behind the cut. )

Proof, I guess, that even before Sybil, the two conditions got confused a lot, enough to get on Konigsberg's nerves.
 
So yeah.  I'm not sure I'd recommend this book as being awesome or anything, but it's an odd, quirky little historical artifact that at least depicts a multi system who are pretty happy and better off as they are!  Worth a read, if you're curious, though be warned there is some mental health stuff in there that can be upsetting.  But nothing really bad happens to anyone, and everything turns out all right in the end.  This is a Konigsberg book, after all; even at their most intense, they have a quiet feeling to them.
lb_lee: M.D. making a shocked, confused face (serious thought)
2017-10-09 05:57 pm
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HTML

Inserting an indent into an HTML document is proving more complicated than I expected. O_o

--Sneak

PS from Mori: I'm positive there's some deeply elegant super-important reason that HTML seems to be moving towards longer and longer tags, but I'm tech-dumb and don't get why <strong> is superior to <b> or <p align="center"> is better than <center>.  Or why apparently you need CSS to do a simple thing like indent.

EDIT from Sneak: Okay!  I've pretty much finished overhauling healthymultiplicity.com!  There are still little bits and stuff I'd like to fix up, but for now, I've got everything how I want it! *flops* PHEW!  And now I eat a very late dinner and sleep!
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-10-06 09:41 pm
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October Patreon Poll

Hey everybody, it's that time again: time to vote for which story/s gets the Patreon money this month!  Unless anyone has any complaints, I'm instating a new rule for these: if a large story gets the vote, as in one that would be posted over the course of many months, that story will be what gets posted until it's completed.  I really don't feel like the whole "vote for each chunk" was working for anyone.

As always, anyone can vote, but patrons get double weight for their votes. If you'd like to be a patron and get bonus content, please consider joining up on Patreon! And if you want to see the blurbs for any of these stories, those are here! If you don't have a DW and so can't do the poll, that's okay; just leave your vote in the comments below; anon comments are turned on.

Which story gets the money? YOU CHOOSE, readers!

Poll #18903 October Story Poll
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 7


Are you a Patreon patron?

View Answers

No
4 (57.1%)

Yes
3 (42.9%)

Which story/s gets posted this month? (pick one or two)

View Answers

The Shitty-Shitty Bang Bang Heist (Infinity Smashed)
2 (28.6%)

Style over Substance (Durable Medical Equipment)
3 (42.9%)

Incognito and the Crips with Capes (Battle the Universe)
3 (42.9%)

Starfishing
0 (0.0%)

Death, Will, and the Girl
0 (0.0%)

lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-10-04 09:02 pm

Infinity Smashed: Number One and the UDC

Number One and the United Dellan Coalition
Series: Infinity Smashed
Word Count: 3000
Summary: M.D.'s older sister gets a new case, comes to Earth, and stays to hash out legalities with the US government and make everyone extremely uncomfortable.
Notes: This story was sponsored by the Patreon crew! It is also the formal introduction for Number One. You definitely want to read Electrical Girl and Airport Security first (which got the latter half rewritten, thus the delays. My apologies).


Number One Eldest Sister was meditating in her lead-walled chambers when she got the news that her sister had been found.

There was no question, of course, that she would be the one to make the retrieval. One’s failings had led to the loss in the first place; it was her responsibility to rectify her errors, and besides, in such situations it was always best to send someone the quarry trusted.

One had long since given her junior up for lost; it was a pleasant surprise to learn otherwise. “I’d be happy to do it,” she said, smiling. “When?”

The handler’s response was not ideal: “Now.” And with a rattle, a mission download came through her meal chute.
Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-10-04 07:37 pm

Airport Security (revised)

Airport Security
Series: Infinity Smashed
Word Count: 3000
Summary: M.D. makes it to the airport, meets a redheaded boy, and then reality unravels completely.
Notes: Some of you might be saying, “Wait, didn’t you post this before?” If so, yup, you got me.  The first version of this story was posted years back, before I charted things out, and it aged abysmally. So I back-tracked and rewrote the second half, and this is why Number One and the United Dellan Coalition is late.  Please accept my apologies.


Getting to the airport as an unaccompanied minor with a cat wasn’t nearly as difficult as I would’ve planned. It was about the only thing that went right for the next week and a half.

Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-09-30 09:20 pm
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Story late.

Number One ignored him;

lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-09-26 11:42 am
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A Crash Course on Multi History, via Books on MPD/DID

I've had a couple requests on this, so here it is, a recommended list of DID books (or DID-ish books) that I wish all multiples would read, even if they're on the opposite end of the multi spectrum.

Why? Because a lot of multiples on the Internet only use Internet sources... and overwhelmingly, they use sources from just the past five to ten years (if you can get a proper source date on them at all). What your teacher used to tell you is true: those who don't remember history are doomed to repeat it. Online plurals are constantly reinventing the wheel, and nogoodniks will take advantage of people's ignorance to claim patent falsehood.

A lot of people don't read these books because a lot of them are terrible. I won't pretend otherwise. They are boring, depressing, infuriating, or factually incorrect. But I'm not recommending these books for pleasure or even teaching what they intend, most of the time. You're not here to see yourself reflected in literature; you're here to learn your history and where all these trends and counter-trends online came from in the first place. It will make some effective bullshit-repellent. (And if you want the works that I have found more helpful personally, skip down to Part Three.)

Optional books are listed as BONUS ROUNDs. You don't have to read them, but if you're feeling up to it, go for it! I've also put them in a general recommended reading order, and tried to stick with books that are easy to find. (And if they aren't, I offer my own copies.)

PART ONE: THE "CLASSICS"

There were multi cases in the 1700s and 1800s, but sadly I don't know a lot about them, and they're hard to find. So we're skipping ahead to the 70s, with the books that helped form the core of multi tropes in pop culture (and sadly, also among therapists), for a good while, leading to the backlash. Florid descriptions of abuse abound!

First, the Classics. )

PART TWO: THE BACKLASH (and the backlash against the backlash)

This section, I promise, will cure you of any fears that non-DID multiples had anything to do with people disbelieving in multiplicity; the backlash was overwhelmingly about abuse and repressed memory. As rates of diagnosed multiples suddenly skyrocketed, the mental health folks were in a bind. Had they truly missed a ton of horrifically abused multiples all these years? Were they overdiagnosing us? Also, we tended to have incredibly creepy, enmeshed relationships with our therapists, who were reparenting us, using drugs to help our recall, and selling books they wrote about us. We had become a status symbol. Backlash was inevitable.

Read more... )
PART THREE: MULTIPLES SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES

Okay, I feel parts 1 and 2 pretty much cover the multi history stuff most folks on the Internet don't bother with.  Those are the bits I cared most about.  But continuing onward, plurals were moving online and speaking for themselves by the mid-90s (with Usenet groups like alt.support.dissociation). So here are some other things, overlapping with and progressing from the backlash period, which I myself hope to read and learn from (but in many cases haven't gotten to yet; I'll note those with the word 'UNREAD').

Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-09-24 11:56 am
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Phone back on, for the moment

We have phone service again, for a little while.  Working out a more permanent solution.

If anyone has an unlocked dumb phone they no longer want, that'd be awesome. (EDIT: we called Freedom Pop up and apparently they only do Smartphones, so it looks like we might get one whether we want to or not.) We will probably be moving to Freedom Pop, but they seem to only offer smartphones, which none of us want.  Obviously, though, a smartphone beats no phone at all.  Still working on it.
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-09-23 06:17 pm
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September Patreon Poll

Hey everybody, it's that time again: time to vote for which story gets the Patreon money this month!  Sorry for the delay; prepping Alter Boys In Love and the last-minute trip to Texas took a chunk out of me. But now we're back on track, and the con rush will end after October! I have some bigger stories planned and in process, and we'll have some new stuff for sale!

As always, anyone can vote, but patrons get double weight for their votes.  If you'd like to be a patron and get bonus content, please consider joining up on Patreon!  And if you want to see the blurbs for any of these stories, those are here!  If you don't have a DW and so can't do the poll, that's okay; just leave your vote in the comments below; anon comments are turned on.

Which story gets the money?  YOU CHOOSE, readers!

Poll #18857 September Story Poll!
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 6


Are you a Patreon patron?

View Answers

No
3 (60.0%)

Yes
2 (40.0%)

Which story gets posted this month?

View Answers

Number One and the United Delland Coalition (I
3 (50.0%)

Style over Substance (Durable Medical Equipment)
3 (50.0%)

Starfishing
0 (0.0%)

Death, Will, and the Girl
0 (0.0%)

lb_lee: A pencil drawing of Mac and Rogan canoodling with a little heart above their heads. (love)
2017-09-23 12:20 am

Alter Boys In Love is almost here!

Hey guys, check it out! We got the new proof of Alter Boys in Love, and it's looking awesome!
Image of Mac showing off the book, cut to spare spam. )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-09-17 05:00 pm

A Brief History of the Use of 'System' in non-DID Space

There is a chestnut of misinformation on tumblr claiming that 'system' is a term made by DID folks, for DID folks, and nobody else is allowed to use it.  This is often wrapped up in the idea that multiplicity is owned by people with DID/DDNOS/OSDD, and anyone else claiming it is appropriating.  This is utter nonsense.  I've written numerous posts on this before, but here is the more thorough breakdown, first focused on the politics of this statement, and then the actual facts of reality.

The Politics: why this argument doesn't make sense, even under its own logic. )

The Facts: twenty-plus years of non-DID multiples using 'system.' )
lb_lee: A picture of Sneak smiling (sneak)
2017-09-17 12:33 pm
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Changing our Internet Usage

Hello!  It's Sneak!  I was thinking about an article that [personal profile] metahacker linked, this one about designing sites addictively.  And it's made me get on board with Mac and Biff's idea about changing how we interact with the Internet!

Namely: we will be deleting our Facebook, and drastically cutting down our tumblr time (if not ending it entirely).

But my reasons for it aren't the same as theirs.  Biff just doesn't like the Internet in general, and Mac noticed that it wasn't making us happy.  Rogan has said he finds internet stuff increasingly overwhelming, and I think I know why: the newer generation of social media sites are designed for constant interaction.

We grew up in an older Internet time, where you weren't expected to be online every day.  You could take a break for a week, and quickly catch up, no problem!  Forums, DeviantArt, Livejournal, all of these sites are (or were) not intended to be used multiple times a day, every day. (Unless you're a HARDCORE user.) The sites were also designed for specific things: to make posts, or put up art.  They weren't expected to be everything for everyone, and while DeviantArt had forums and chatrooms, you could do perfectly fine without them. (And I don't think the chatrooms were there when we first joined.)

However, as time has gone on and more folks are on the Internet more often, these sites have changed their design philosophy.  Instead of being made for folks to interact maybe a few times a week, they're now made to be posted on multiple times a day for long stretches.  They're also more generalized.  For instance, Facebook was originally intended for folks applying for college, or in college; now it's used to organize offline events and work engagements, catch up with people from your past, and have heated political arguments.  It has groups, events, chats, games, individual pages, all with very questionable security and ethics, and they sell the information for profit.

I don't think it's paranoid to say that a site like Facebook designs itself to be as omnipresent as possible so they can get as much information (and therefore as much profit) as they can from their users!  But I can say that it makes the site not a lot of fun to be on, for us anyway.  Even the nicest site in the world would get overwhelming and tiresome when you're encouraged to be there all the time!  And by trying to be everything for everyone, their designs tend to fall apart, because they're trying to do so many things at the same time.  So it becomes awfully byzantine (in the case of Facebook) or just plain incoherent and broken (like tumblr)!

Arguments and conflict happen on every website.  But when a site is designed to be used all the time, the rate of interaction as high as possible, then it means that instead of seeing conflict maybe once a month, you see it all the time, and that's its own kind of draining!  On the whole, I think that we are just not able to keep up with sites like that, and that it's bad for our health to try.

In other words, it's time to refocus our online energy to websites that are designed for fewer, more specific interactions!  Therefore, I personally vote in agreement for deleting our Facebook, continuing our low/no tumblr usage, and refocusing our attention on sites like Dreamwidth.

--Sneak

lb_lee: A picture of Sneak smiling (sneak)
2017-09-16 02:16 pm

Queer Crip Pride shirts!

Hey guys, did you love the gorgeous textures and typography for our covers of the Homeless Year and Alter Boys In Love?  Awesome news, the designer friend who did those is now selling awesome queer disability pride shirts!  We're planning on buying the purple one with the pink 'disability pride' letters.

Also there's a sale going for about nine more hours, so snatch one on the cheap!

Woo, T-shirts!

--Sneak and Mori

lb_lee: Miranda saying "REALITY" with airquotes. (realitylolz)
2017-09-13 02:29 pm
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Back from Texas!

Hello all!  As you can see, we've returned from our trip, and it wasn't as bad as Mori feared.  We're rather tired, but I'll give the quick sum-up!
  • The con went very well.  The entire trip cost us less than thirty dollars, thanks to Rogan selling well.  Huzzah!
  • We took all the photographs we needed of our childhood neighborhood, and I daresay we are now prepared for future comics set there.  Well done, dears! (However, we did not get to visit Candle Cave.  That's all right, Biff got a good hike, and regardless, we went in presuming it would be a bonus, not a given.)
  • We got to see some people of our past, including a couple high school friends, and Dr. Drag. (Dr. Drag was our first therapist, though we have not had that sort of relationship in years.  She has mentions on this blog, probably buried under the 'therapy' tag.) Their generosity allowed us to make this trip, and we are very grateful.
  • Rogan finished Alter Boys In Love, but due to the printer's website being broken on Mozilla and some truly peculiar requests regarding our formatting, we have not managed to finish the order.  We hope to complete that today.
  • Due to the intense work schedule, and the emotional challenge of returning to our hometown, Rogan has been worn out.  He will not be fronting for a bit, and Mori, Biff, Sneak, and I will manage things until he has rested up.

Thank you for your patience!
--Miranda
lb_lee: M.D. making a shocked, confused face (serious thought)
2017-09-06 11:04 am
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Neighborhood Newsletter: The Turtles Did It

So, while researching our childhood neighborhood, we ran across an archive of the old neighborhood newsletter, going back to 2010.

Most of it is basically what we remember--babysitting, Lawn of the Month, classifieds, neighborhood events, water rationing and fire safety... and then there's some weird stuff.  Mostly of the "Suburban Gothic" variety, but some honestly just strange.  Skimming a year and a half of this newsletter for photos, I learned...
  • There are adults in our neighborhood who would chase teenagers in their car for knocking over trash cans.  And have a car chase with the kids until the cops came.  And then be called a superhero.
  • Somebody killed a deer with a crossbow.  And just... left the deer to run and die. (The newsletter reminded everyone that the neighborhood was not a hunting zone and to be nice to the animals.)
  • The turtles in the pond get blamed for everything.  Everything.
  • Somebody got murdered and their body got dumped in the park, but don't worry guys, he wasn't one of the neighbors!  The neighborhood remains safe!  It's all good! (The turtles were not responsible.)
  • People have very, VERY passionate feelings about who exactly is allowed to use the pool and basketball court. (The pool is now open to folks only with a keycard, which is just the strangest thing ever to me.  I mean, I understand that this is a thing that happens, but really, were there truly that many people sneaking into the pool for nefarious purposes?)
  • Texas is apparently God's country.
  • People really want those turtles GONE.  Nobody knows where they came from.  Nobody knows why their population skyrocketed so.  But nobody wants the turtles.  The turtles have taken over.  They're not even snappers or anything, just your usual red-ears, so I'm not sure what people's beef is with them.
I am left with the assurance that the Homeowners Association is just as strange a beast as I suspected.

lb_lee: A pencil sketch of me drawing/writing in my sketchpad. (art)
2017-09-05 09:50 am
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Out of Town for Staple!

We will be out of town for Staple Con, Saturday September 9th and Sunday the 10th,  at the Millennium Youth Entertainment Complex  in Austin, Texas!  We will be at table 48B!

Due to the con, we will be out of town from Thursday to Tuesday, and we will not be online during that time.

EDIT: added table

lb_lee: A short-haired person flexing their muscles and declaring, "Queer trans multi proud!" (pride)
2017-08-31 05:15 pm

Queer-Baiting

Queer-baiting is a fascinating (and maddening) subject for me. I feel that it’s so complicated because there are different rules for different periods of time and different levels of mainstream. Getting a queer character in a gay newspaper comic was a totally different business than having one in mainstream superhero comics. However, I think I know what my personal dividing line is!

Namely: if a creator never brings up the queerness at all, that is fine. I accept that I am projecting myself and my desires into a work (or that the creator is sneaking under the radar). If a creator brings up the queerness and makes it open, ala Dykes to Watch Out For, then that too is fine--I have myself a genuine queer character! In neither case do I feel baited.

However, I do feel baited when the creators make clear that they’ve thought about the queerness involved and bring it up to the audience, only to then take pains shooting it down, or making a joke about it, or otherwise deflecting it. Then I am left with the feeling that a creator has thought about the idea of having a queer character, only to go, “Nah.”

Creators who intend to have actual queer characters, even if they use subtext at first, will show increasing care for the issues as time goes on, often fighting for more and more representation as their careers progress. That “baiting” feeling comes when the subtext is considered a feature, not a bug, and kept for its own sake, never to change. It’s that context that makes a big difference to me.
Read more... )...they deflect. Often with a joke. In I Can’t Believe It’s Not The Justice League!, pictured above, the joke is at Booster Gold and the Blue Beetle’s expense--it’s funny because they’re offended and wigged out by the implication that they’re “more than friends,” or that their teammate would tell Booster’s wife that. And sure, this is a comedy book where everyone acts ridiculous, but still, the base undertone of the story isn’t that being gay for your best friend is okay. (For even when characters say “there’s nothing wrong with it,” it’s hard to believe them when there are no queer characters to model it.) It’s that being gay for your best friend is... well, a joke. And also might get you in trouble with your spouse.
Even when the joke is ostensibly “friendlier,” the deflection aspect bugs me. The bromance of Hot Fuzz doesn’t have the same punch-line as the I Can’t Believe It’s Not The Justice League joke. In Hot Fuzz, there was originally going to be a female love interest character for Simon Pegg’s character, but the character was scrapped and her lines given to Nick Frost’s character instead. The joke mostly seems to be about embracing that homoeroticism, perhaps asking why it makes people uncomfortable, or where the line is drawn. The actors and director involved voiced their official support for slash fic about the characters, even calling Hot Fuzz slash fic all on its own.

But here’s the thing. Pegg and Frost’s characters, for all this lauding and official approval, aren’t actually gay. They might star in an R-rated movie with impalement, decapitation, and geysers of blood, but they aren’t gay. The screencap above is the gayest things will get. The whole thing is just jokes--winks at their audience and fanbase, along the lines of “you’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

Unlike Coville or Stevenson, these guys don’t show increasing engagement as their work progresses; this is all anyone gets. In Shaun of the Dead from 2004, there were jokes about Simon Pegg and Nick Frost’s characters being gay for each other. In Hot Fuzz from 2007, there were jokes about Pegg and Frost’s characters being gay for each other. And in Paul, from 2011? You guessed it, jokes about Pegg and Frost’s characters being gay for each other, where the title character asks by simulating a blowjob and then insisting that there’s nothing wrong with it. It’s exactly the same level of jokes and engagement, no change--and again, it’s hard to say “there’s nothing wrong with it” when you never actually allow any character to say they’re “it” on screen. Never once do any of the characters involved say, “Why, yes, I am” when asked if gay. In Shaun of the Dead and Paul, they say no. In Hot Fuzz, the question is never asked to begin with. When the creators are asked, they joke around it, but never really say, knowing that the ambiguity is all part of the game.

After all, “slashy” and “gay” are not the same thing. Slash, by its very definition, requires that it not be canon.
I’m not saying that these works are bad; like I said, I enjoyed them a lot at the time. And I’m not saying they can’t be helpful or meaningful to queer folks; part of why I loved Hot Fuzz and I Can’t Believe It’s Not The Justice League! so much in college was because I myself felt that my being gay was terrible and bad, so I found the ambiguity and deflection relatable and engaging. It allowed me to think about things like the fact that I was gay for my best friend or wanted to cuddle with him while still pretending to myself that I could be a conventionally masculine, “normal” guy, avoiding the stigma of being gay.

But that was me projecting myself into the narrative, not what the narrative was actually telling me. That was me having such a dearth of actual gay characters to relate to that I found straight characters who said they were straight more relatable!

As time went on, that changed. I found more queer media with actual queer characters, and realized that the stereotypes in my head did not actually reflect queer reality. I discovered that queer stories were so much more than the soap opera tragedy and coming out stories I’d read so many times before--that I could read about queer superheroes, queer space captains, queer lovers who could actually kiss and fuck on-screen and say “I love you” on-screen, without an immediate, “you know, in a platonic way.” I could read about people who were actually like me, not people I pretended were like me.

Had I read ICBINTJL or watched Hot Fuzz now for the first time, I probably wouldn’t like them very much. I didn’t get to Paul until a year or two ago, and I didn’t enjoy the bromance; as I watched Seth Rogen’s alien mime blowjobs for laughs, only to say, “not that there’s anything wrong with it,” I only felt uncomfortable, knowing that I was the joke, that someone like me would never be allowed to actually be queer on that screen.  Even when Paul said that everyone on his planet was bisexual, it rang false to me.  If that were true, why would he ask?  Why would he do so coyly by miming blowjobs instead of asking straight-out?

Because the performance was not actually intended to be for my benefit, or my bi husband's benefit.  It was for the straight audience's benefit, the ones who were in on the joke.

And that was when I felt baited.
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
2017-08-31 04:08 pm

Battle the Universe: The Reality Warper

The Reality Warper
Series: Battle the Universe
Word Count: 3000
Summary: A former superhero breaks out of the mental hospital, and reality starts to go horribly wrong. Tank tries to help.
Notes: This story was sponsored by the generous Patreon crew! It takes place after Tank got fired from respectable superheroing, and references some of the events in The First Rule of Blackmail, but you don't need to read any of the other stories to get this one; all you need to know is, Tank is multiple, and Kara and Lucinda fielded this case.  Scroll to the bottom to see the content warnings.

Helena Liu woke up and reality wasn’t real.

Oh, it looked real, but Helena knew. She always knew. Proper reality had a texture, a special way it felt against her fingertips, and if it wasn’t there, then she knew it wasn’t real. When she woke up, there was no texture, and even though everything still looked all right, she knew it wouldn’t for much longer.

She tried to tell the hospital staff, but they wouldn’t listen to her. They told her to keep to her routines, take her medication, and they just didn’t understand. To act like this was acceptable would be to encourage it, and Helena couldn’t do that. She’d made a promise.

But she couldn’t explain that to them.

Read more... )