lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
[personal profile] lb_lee

Nope, no, it’s too late, now I’m mad.

Going off the posts that inspired this, ‘little’ can mean, depending who you’re talking to, ‘small,’ ‘a child,’ ‘my inner child,’ ‘a member of a multiple system who is a child,’ or ‘a role that I play in kink activities.’ All of these uses of ‘little’ make total sense, and pretending that using any one version is ‘stealing’ from the DID community is so laughably absurd that I’m astounded anyone even pauses to consider it.  Except I'm not, because it’s actually a clever little thought-trap.
 

Saying, “You’re appropriating from the marginalized” puts the person in a double bind where if they’re not a member of said marginalized community, they are not qualified enough to actually prove the term false without showing themselves as a privileged self-absorbed chucklefuck.  Now, a true chucklefuck won’t CARE, so won’t fall for it, but for someone who cares very deeply about their language and being considerate, they’re stuck.  This trap takes advantage of their desire to be a considerate, caring person, using it instead to strong-arm them into believing something totally ridiculous. (Because after all, they can’t just GO to a member of the marginalized community and ask, because “EDUCATE YOURSELF.” They can’t even challenge the person’s own credentials, even if they’re some faceless anonymous, because how insensitive!)

So you develop this environment where to shut down even the most blatant of bullshit, you have to have (and publicly admit) to having these correct demographic marginalization markers.  And that royally pisses me off!

First of all, disproving a statement SHOULD NOT REQUIRE membership of a certain group.  I’ve been able to disprove blatant horseshit (like that long-running tumblr myth “multiple is a DID-only term!”) with the most basic cursory research.  And that is how statements SHOULD be disproven, with logic, critical thinking, and research.  Those are skills that can be taught and developed.  Community membership, however, can NOT.  You’ve either got DID (professionally and expensively diagnosed, of course) or you don’t, and if you don’t, you’re fucked.  You might as well not even BOTHER using critical thinking, because apparently that’s ABLEIST.

And second, by creating this whole membership requirement, it kinda behooves folks like ME to waste my carefully hoarded spoons to go around stomping misinformation, when I have so many better things I could be doing.  I could be drawing a pretty picture, or cleaning my room, or petting Genius Cat, but nooooo, I end up doing THIS, because I have my stupid street cred so I’m ALLOWED to say, “No, this is total horseshit,” without opening myself up to unscrupulous trolls who use their own demographics as beating-sticks.

This isn’t a DID-only thought trap, of course.  I’ve seen it used in pretty much any circle I run in that involves some form of marginalization.  But it INFURIATES me.  Critical thinking is a skill that should be encouraged and taught; it is not something to be held hostage to demographic membership.  And that should NEVER be controversial.

--Rogan

Date: 2016-10-17 05:33 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] quandary_system
I cannot say "thank you" and "THIS THIS THIS" enough. This sort of shit bothers us to no end.

>You’ve either got DID (professionally and expensively diagnosed, of course)

Oh *Christ*. I'll confess right now that this bullshit right here made us feel pressured to get a formal diagnosis. It has the implication that without a fancy professional stamp, your trauma ain't real and your experiences ain't real. Nope, doesn't matter that we lose time and split off new people under stress and that we're sick 24 hours a day from brain bullshit, we're fake and gotta diaf for the good of all DIDdom, brb.

Meanwhile, the bulk of the people we've met outside these little circles, DID or not, DO NOT GIVE A FUCK. One of the systems we're best friends with, who are Professionally Diagnosed, have said they're sick of this kind of shit, have seen it do no end of harm, and believe that self-diagnoses (when well-researched) matter more than professional diagnoses when it comes to usefulness.

We don't feel quite as pressured anymore after realizing that and figuring out that the root of this sort of pressure is because that sort of bullshit repeats past abuse we've had and provokes the same defense mechanisms, but it's still shitty. :/

-- Ca.

Date: 2016-10-18 01:16 am (UTC)
chrysalissystem: espeon with glowing red eyes (jewel)
From: [personal profile] chrysalissystem
Honestly the term "little" is so vague that you can't copyright it as a system thing.

I actually hate DDLG things because it fucking scares me and I don't want to see it ever. But I don't tell people how to run their life so I don't engage anyone who does that.

But honestly I don't think kinksters started looking at DID forums or anything and go "HMMMM A TERM FOR CHILD ALTERS? THAT WOULD BE GREAT FOR MY FETISH"

and the term headspace was used before it applied to inner worlds/whatever

--jewel

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