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Ramblings of LB
2015-04-11 02:44 am (UTC)
Another sinister aspect of dissociation is that it prevents people from protecting children who depend on them, thus helping perpetuate abuse. You mentioned that your mother was possibly dissociative, too, and kind of floated away when you were suffering and needed her. Olga Trujillo in The Sum of My Parts had horrifying descriptions of her mother spacing out when a young Olga was being abused literally before her eyes.
My issue with adults failing to protect children due to dissociation is not that they are dissociative, which also happened to them because of continuous trauma that they had no other way to deal with, but that they took no steps to take care of these problems and protect their kids. Acquiring defense mechanisms due to trauma in unavoidable, but to know--or willfully ignore--that you're hurting children because you shut down at crucial times and do nothing about it is reprehensible.
This sort of thing is one of many reasons I object to using "crazy" interchangeably with irrationality or evil. Trauma-based craziness actually has a lot of rationality behind it; it's our minds working as designed, trying to keep us alive and functional (in that order, and not always accurately or proportionately, hence crazy). And being crazy is not evil; evil is knowing that your craziness is hurting people and not taking steps to manage it. Accuracy in language, people, it's not that hard!
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