Okay, okay, so they never tell you this in Christmas time, but Santa and his old lady totally had conjoined twins as kids.
Now, Santa and the missus, they’re cool people right, they want to do right by their kids, but they totally weren’t prepared for this. So they do what a lot of folks do, right, and they talk to the doctor about what the right thing is to do for their kids. Should they be separated? CAN they?
And the doctor says no, they share a digestive tract, there’s no way the kids could be safely separated. Much better that they live as they are, since they seem pretty okay, just different. They’ll be all right, because after all: a semicolon can be used between two closely related independent Clauses.
The Jerk Bus beat me. They kept moving too fast, not staying anywhere for long, and spreading misinformation about when and where they'd be, so I couldn't catch up to them.
So now I've got a bunch of resources and nothing to do with them. You can download the whole load free here, I guess; I'm gonna take it down in a week, because some of it is pirated and I don't want to bilk my own community. The whole thing contains:
( Resources )Man, can't believe I burned all that energy for nothing. Stupid bus.
COME ON I'M NOT THE FLASH GIVE ME A
EDIT: annnnnd now the CD burner isn't working. Apparently it can only do three at a time and then it dies.
This whole thing is turning into a way bigger pain in my ass and chaotic clusterfuck than I anticipated.
Okay, I got a Free Speech Bus plan. (The Free Speech Bus is this total horseshit bus covered in slogans about how only XX girls and XY boys exist and anyone who says otherwise is against free speech and also SCIENCE because that's totally how science works.)
Tempted as I am to just vandalize the damn thing, I talked to Rogan and I'm actually thinking I might be better off trying something else. Much as I hate giving these dude a platform, I think I hate being played even more, and their whole idea is to try and trigger outrage and then play the victim. If I can't change their minds, and I can't stop the bus for longer than a short time, I'd rather help the people they go after.
Rogan: Now I can finally listen to music again WITHOUT my damn computer. YESSSSSS! And listen to our damn mix-tapes!
Me and Rogan ranted about it to each other for half an hour. (Nice thing about headmates, you can do that and odds are good SOMEONE else in there will care about your topic. Mac and Biff totally jetted though.) Seriously, what? WHAT?
Man, I need to go clean out my brain-mouth with Enron books now.
He decided to celebrate by scrubbing the apartment with me. It badly needed a clean, and what with our shoulder being all fucked up, it's been Rogan stuck at front a while. But now we can kick hiss ass off and take over again. Yeehaw!
Anyway, roomie got Biff some apple cider (dude is fucking obsessed with cider) and caramel ice cream so he can make himself an apple cider affogato. He is ridiculously excited about this. And so am I since I am all for activities that involve me getting fed. DESSERT FOR US!
Rogan: Just finished watching the first season of Cleverman with our roommate. Man, that show is INTENSE, and relentlessly paced, but great! Uber-glad we watched it, dying for another season because it ended on a cliffhanger.
Mori: Also, Biff actually paid attention while it was on. Usually he can’t give less of a shit about any kind of fiction. It’s all science and history shows with him. (And cooking. Dude fucking loves cooking shows.) I’m starting to think it’s not the fiction that bugs him, it’s how white and unrelatable it is to him. Stuff to check out!
Everybody needs a hobby, I guess. Sneak’s include horror game Let’s Plays and crafts. Mac and Biff have cooking. Miranda has slash fanfiction and meditation. I’ve got cults.
Mori’s is apparently the seamy underbelly of the US business and financial sector.
And now she’s trying to explain securities and stock buybacks to me. Good luck with that, kid.
Congratulations, dudema, your jurisdiction is now cleaning, laundry, shopping, and all household matters that Rogan's too distracted and Mac's too lazy to do.
Series: LB/Infinity Smashed AU. Take your pick.
Word Count: 1600
Summary: Biff slowly builds up the image he wants other people to have of him... and then slowly strips it down.
Notes: This story was funded by the Patreon crew! Thanks, everyone. Also note that this story follows System-Biff's life, rather than the story version y'all're familiar with. More notes at the bottom.
It starts when Biff runs away from home.
He's had his powers a few years now, but he's still not very good at them. He's never needed them, not like this.
( Read more... )
Biff and Mori, just paling around. They aren’t touchy-feely in general, but make big exceptions for each other. Biff’s facial hair is coming back in, and he’s just as shit about shaving it as he was ten years ago.Drew this as quick figure study, because they’re almost the same height, but he’s beef and she’s noodles.